Archive | Body Works

28-Day Estrogen Forecast.

This is my new bible. Above is a pic of the 99 cent calendar I’m using to chart my monthly estrogen and progesterone cycles. Now before you go there, no… I’m not trying to have a baby. (Can you imagine?) Nope… this is me attempting to forecast which days are the best (and worst!) for […]

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A Hostage Situation.

For the last month, I’ve felt like a full-blown toad. Toad in my world is synonymous with bloated. Cranky. Sluggish. Chunky. Heavy. Swollen. Like a busted can of Pillsbury Grands Biscuits. It started during my tropical vacation where drinks flowed and several of my workouts went MIA. Then, I barreled right through the holidays stuffing […]

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Dear Body Parts: Apologies in Advance.

I have some damn lofty goals this year. In the back of my mind, I have one KingPin, (the mother of all goals), two B-rated goals, and a handful of easy-to-get, confidence building C level intentions. My KingPin this year, (should I finally man up and commit), would be to complete my first half-Ironman on […]

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From Setback To Comeback.

I am soooo freakin’ frustrated. I rarely talk about the long, painful, disheartening, totally f*ing ridiculous, expensive, time-sucking road to recovery from IT Band Syndrome. Why? Honestly, because no one I know wants to hear, at nauseam, about someone else’s injury. (Am I right?) But here’s the gig: I’ve been busting my a** at physical therapy for […]

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The Land of Scared Sh*tless.

I had my a** handed to me this weekend. I was in Omaha for an early family Christmas. Which also (apparently) means I was at the ever-lovin’ mercy of my half-crazy sister-in-law Dannika. Saturday morning, she invited me to hit up her local Kosama class and I thought, “Of course! I’m a marathoner for Christ […]

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The Path To Inner Body Pollution.

This week has been a bucket of bat sh*t. First and foremost, let me state [for the record] that I will very likely meet my Maker before I EVER put my body through another detox. And while I now know I can simply survive sans dairy, sugar and caffeine, forever more it will take an […]

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The Meanest Thing I’ve Ever Done.

It’s getting ugly ’round here. Yesterday was my first full day of detox. Holy. If anyone tells you a whole foods detox is easy, they are a BOLD, unforgivable liar. In the morning, I miss caffeine. Around 2:00 p.m., I miss gluten. And around 6 p.m., it’s all I can do not to pour myself […]

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